Prologue
The tall blond haired man walked clumsily along the street, pulling his slightly torn woolen overcoat closer around him to try and ward off the chill that seemed to have taken permanent residence in his body. Today was warm and sunny, typical for late summer, but he didn’t care... every day was gray to him now, filled with nothing but despair and the need to eat, sleep and keep warm.
Reaching up a hand he rubbed at the stubble on his face, annoyed at the itchiness- but until he could find another discarded razor blade there wasn’t much he could do about it. He badly needed a wash; his once neat hair had begun to grow and now hung slightly past his chin, matted and dirty. No one took much notice of him, apart from to stare in shock, or to cross the street to get as far away from him as possible- but that was fine with him, because he didn’t want to be near anyone.
He’d been walking the streets now for days, weeks, months... the exact time was unclear. At first he’d counted the days, trying to keep track of how long he’d been living on the streets, but when the hunger and weariness had taken over, all that had mattered was finding any scraps of food that he could; any discarded blankets or old clothes he could find to keep him warm during the long, dark, uncomfortable nights. What day it was, or even where he was, suddenly became unimportant.
He didn’t remember who he was or where he’d come from, or that his name was Andrew and he’d once been an Angel of Death... all he knew now was a vague memory of a young woman with long dark hair... and a feeling that if he could find her, he’d understand everything.
***
Tess and Monica walked along the street past numerous alleyways and shop doorways, stepping carefully around the piles of rubbish that on closer inspection were actually the sleeping places of several homeless people. The youngest angel frowned, watching as a girl not much older than her human form, staggered past them, blanket in one hand and hypodermic needle in the other. “Aw, Tess... how do these people end up like this?”
The oldest angel stopped walking, causing Monica to stop as well for the younger angel was holding onto her arm. “You’ve seen this before, Angel Girl- and you know that there are many problems and situations that can cause a human being to end up living rough.”
“I know, Tess. I just...” Monica took another look around her and sighed. “It always saddens me to see this- especially because I understand what it’s like. After my assignment a few years ago, I’ve never forgotten what it was like to feel so cold, and unloved. It was frightening, Tess.”
Her supervisor nodded. “I know, baby. And that’s why the Father wants you here- because you understand what these people are going through.” She turned to point to building across the street, with a sign above the door which said ‘Homeless Shelter- All Welcome’. “You will be working in there, Angel Girl.”
Monica stared at the building, watching the numerous people wandering in and out of the door. “I don’t know if I can help them all, Tess...?” She turned back to her supervisor, who shook her head. “The Father doesn’t want you to help them all. Your assignment is one person- one homeless soul who has forgotten everything, and lost everything.” Her eyes took on a sad, faraway look. “You need to help him find his way back.”
The youngest angel looked puzzled. “Find his way back where, Tess?”
Tess sighed. “Back to where he came from, baby.”
A minute later they were standing inside the homeless shelter, invisible to everyone as they watched the queue of people waiting for some hot soup. “Which one is my assignment, Tess?”
Tess sighed. “He’s not here right now, Angel Girl. But he will be- and when he does, you’ll know.”
The youngest angel nodded, although she still looked confused. She dropped her gaze, sighing, and Tess noticed. “What’s wrong?”
“It just... feels strange without Andrew being here.” She looked up at Tess with teary eyes. “Where is he, Tess? It's been almost three weeks, and... I thought that after all this time, he’d be back here, doing assignments."
Tess sighed, looking at her young charge compassionately. “Baby... Andrew won’t be working on assignments for a while yet, I told you that already. Now you have got to concentrate on your assignment, Miss Wings. You’re an Angel of God, and you must do the work He asks of you- and this assignment is important. Very important.”
=================
Chapter One
The day passed slowly for Monica as she began her shift in the homeless shelter, her first job being to help serve lunch to the people who came to the shelter. The job was straightforward enough, but it was heart-wrenching for her to see so many people in need of help, and she found herself wishing she could help them all. And she kept remembering what Tess had said to her- she would know when her assignment walked in. How, though? That was what she couldn't understand.
She smiled as she handed a bowl of hot soup to a middle-aged woman. "There you go." The woman turned away and Monica began spooning some more soup into a bowl, ready for the next homeless person to approach. She lifted her gaze, holding out the bowl, but the words died on her lips when she saw the face staring down at her. Unable to speak she almost dropped the bowl of soup, her hands beginning to shake, but the man took the bowl from her silently, gazing at her for a moment before turning away.
Finding her voice, Monica called after him, but he didn't respond. The young angel moved away from her counter, ignoring the shout from her co-worker that there were more people to serve. She made her way to the table in the corner where the man had seated himself, his head bowed over the soup as he ate hungrily. Taking a chair across from him she sat down, reaching out a hand to his arm, but he looked up sharply, startling her, and she withdrew her hand. "Andrew... what are you doing here?"
Andrew stared at Monica for a long moment, finally putting down his spoon. "You know me?"
Monica was taken aback not only by her friend's words, but the gruff, almost angry way in which they'd been spoken. "Andrew, it's... it's me, Monica...." She frowned, seeing the hardness of his green eyes, the total lack of recognition or even friendliness in his expression. "Don't you... know who I am?"
Shaking his head, Andrew ate some more of the soup, obviously very hungry. He sighed, looking up to stare at Monica, and when he spoke again it was with just as much anger as before. "I don't even know who I am, never mind anybody else. I've been waiting a long time to find someone who..." He narrowed his eyes, looking her over carefully, but before he could say anything else, Monica's emotions got the better of her and she got up quickly from her seat, tears pricking at her eyes. "Excuse me..." She ran past the rest of the homeless people, past her co-workers, and into the room at the back, where she broke down sobbing. Glancing heavenward, she spoke softly. "Is this what my assignment is? I-I thought Andrew was safe with You..."
"He wanted to come back to earth, baby, and the Father felt it was the best thing for him." Tess' voice was gentle and compassionate as she appeared in the room next to Monica, holding out her arms to the younger angel. Monica went to her supervisor, leaning against her in a sorrowful hug as Tess wrapped her arms around her. "Now you see why this assignment is so important, baby."
Monica pulled away slightly to look up at her supervisor. "What happened to him, Tess?"
"Well, with all the anger that was in Andrew's heart, he couldn't go back to being an Angel until he got rid of those negative feelings. He wanted to come back to earth to find you, but the Father granted him his wish because He knew that the only way for Andrew to rid himself of those angry feelings, was to forget everything that had happened and learn to love again."
Monica sniffed back a tear and shook her head. "But how can he love when he doesn't have anywhere to live, and he doesn't remember anything? Tess, he... he doesn't even remember me...!"
Tess nodded, reaching up to wipe Monica's tears. "I know, baby, I know. But that's why you're here, to help our Angel Boy remember who he used to be, an Angel of Death... an Angel of Peace, not an angry Angel."
"I-I don't know if I can do this, Tess... just seeing him, seeing the look in his eyes, it's like... it's like it's not the Andrew that I know, and..." The young angel frowned, trying to think through everything that was happening.
Tess sighed. "Angel Girl, the Father requested you for this assignment because He knows that the love you hold in your heart for Andrew is the thing that's gonna save him. Andrew needs you now, baby... and you have to be strong for him. Can you do that?"
Monica was hesitant for a long moment, and finally nodded. "Yes. I want to help him, Tess."
The older angel smiled, pulling Monica toward her and hugging her again. "You've made the right choice, baby. I know you can help him. I know you can."
***
Monica returned to the main area of the homeless shelter, her eyes scanning the room until she found the table where Andrew had been sitting- but it was empty. Panicking, she looked all around the room, but her friend was nowhere to be seen. She turned to one of her co-workers, Jake, who was still handing out soup. "Where did he go?"
Jake frowned impatiently. "Who?"
"The man who was sitting over there... he had blond hair, and a scruffy long overcoat."
Rolling his eyes, Jake handed out another bowl of soup to the next person in line. "You've gotta be kidding, right? You just described half of the people who come in here. Now, you gonna help me with this lunch or not?"
Frustrated, Monica shook her head. "I'll be back in a minute..." Ignoring Jake's annoyed look, the young angel ran out of the homeless shelter and looked up and down the street, but there was no sign of Andrew. Unsure what to do, she walked back into the shelter and resumed her work, hoping that Andrew would come into the shelter again soon.
***
Andrew had watched the young woman get up and leave the table, confused by the fact that she was upset. He didn't know whether or not to trust what she was saying- he didn't recognize her, so why should he believe anything she said? She even gave him a name... Andrew... and for a fleeting moment he wondered if she might be the woman he was seeking, the vague impression he had deep inside of him of someone he needed to find...
But almost as soon as he thought about that, a voice inside of him told him that he was just being silly- he didn't know this woman, and he certainly didn't think his name was Andrew. Something wasn't right, he felt uneasy in a way that he couldn't explain. And suddenly he felt like he couldn't stay in that place any longer. Quickly finishing his soup he headed outside, wondering where to go, when suddenly he heard a woman shouting.
"Adrian! Adrian, wait!"
Something made him turn around, and he saw a woman with short brown hair running toward him, and when she reached his side she flung her arms around him, startling him. "I can't believe I've found you after all this time!" She kissed his cheek, pulling back to smile at him, tears running down her cheeks.
Confused, Andrew frowned at her. "Do I know you?"
"Know me? Of course you... oh, you don't remember anything, do you darling?" The woman smiled, reaching for his hand. "I've missed you so much, Adrian..."
"My... my name's Adrian? But..." Andrew frowned, turning back to look at the homeless shelter, thinking of the young woman he'd met in there. Was this why the name Andrew didn't sound right? Because his real name was Adrian? But could he trust this woman any more than the other? Turning back to the stranger, he shook his head. "I-I'm sorry, but I don't know who you are."
The woman briefly glared at the homeless shelter, but Andrew didn't notice. Then she turned to him, looking deep into his eyes, making him feel almost dizzy, making him forget his doubts. "Adrian, you must remember me. I'm Kathleen, your wife." And then, without allowing him any room to argue, she linked her arm into his and began leading him down the street and around the corner, out of sight of the shelter.
===================
Chapter Two
Andrew didn't know what to think. He'd been visiting the homeless shelter for over a week now, taking whatever meals he could get, and had never seen the young woman before, the one who'd claimed to know him. And now suddenly after that shock, another woman had appeared as if out of nowhere, claiming to be his wife. The situation was strange to him, and he didn't know what to do next.
But it seemed that Kathleen had other ideas. "Honey, you must remember me! We were so happy together... please, try and remember, darling!"
She linked her arm into his, looking up at him with slightly wet eyes, and Andrew searched her face, desperate to remember. How could he forget his own wife, he wondered? Then again, he'd forgotten everything else- including his name. "I-I'm sorry, but... I really don't remember you. Or that other woman, in there..." He pointed back towards where he'd come from, and Kathleen scowled.
"That other woman... is a liar- and she certainly isn't anyone important to you, Adrian. I'm your wife... and I've missed you so much. So, how about I take you home, huh? You look like you could use a decent meal- not the watery soup they serve in there."
Andrew looked at her doubtfully. "How can I go with you when I have no idea whether or not you're telling the truth?"
Kathleen sighed heavily, obviously irritated, and she reached into her purse, pulling out a photograph... of her and Andrew together, him wearing a smart suit, her in a short, pale blue wedding dress. She showed this to Andrew, whose eyes widened. "This... was us? On our wedding day?" He lifted his gaze from the photograph to Kathleen, who smiled smugly. As a demon, anything was possible. Especially with an angel who couldn't even remember who he was.
"Yes... that was us... and we've been so happy ever since! Until... until one day, you were gone! I looked everywhere for you, Adrian, and I was so afraid I would never see you again!" She looked up at Andrew, trying her hardest to look upset, but he just looked at her in confusion.
"I-I'm sorry, er... Kathleen... but... I don't know about this." Andrew ran a hand through his hair, wishing his memory would just return so he wouldn't feel so awkward.
Kathleen sighed impatiently. "What other proof do you need, Adrian? I'm your wife! I've got no reason to lie about that!" She looked deep into his eyes again, erasing his doubts.
"But what about..." Andrew turned and glanced down the road, to where they'd just come from, thinking about the woman he'd met in the shelter.
"I told you already, she's not important to you now! I'm the one you should be concerned about- I'm your wife, honey... and I've missed you so much." Grabbing the photograph from Andrew, she shoved it back in her purse and then took his arm again. "Come on, Adrian. Let's go home." And then with an evil smile, purposely hidden from the confused blond man who had no choice but to go with her, she set off walking down the road.
===================
Chapter Three
By the time Monica's shift at the homeless shelter was over, the young angel was anxious to leave the place; not because she didn't like helping those people, on the contrary, she loved to help; but it was because she was desperate to find Andrew again. She now understood that he was her assignment; Andrew, the angel she'd always looked up to, after the somewhat rocky start to their friendship when they'd first met a few years previously. He was always there for her, always strong, always the one leading her back on the right path when she made mistakes or felt unable to do her work.
And now it was going to be up to her to bring Andrew back, to help him remember who he was, and to overcome the problems he'd suffered which had caused him to be in this situation in the first place. It was a daunting prospect, and she couldn't deny that she was worried, not to mention scared for her dear friend, now that she knew he hadn't spent the past couple of weeks in God's Country, as she'd thought; but in fact he had been right here on Earth, with nowhere to live.
Unsure what to do once her shift ended, the young angel walked out of the shelter to find Tess waiting for her, and she breathed a sigh of relief, more glad than usual to see her supervisor. "Tess..." She went to the older angel's side, finding the tears suddenly pooling in her eyes and she reacted by throwing her arms around Tess, hugging her tightly.
Tess returned the hug, hating to see her young charge in so much emotional pain, and just as worried for Andrew's situation. She had only been told about Andrew's plight the day before this assignment had begun, and it had shocked her totally. But she understood why she hadn't been told; because keeping the full details from Monica would have been impossible, and if the youngest angel had known what was happening to her best friend, she would have surely tried to find him; and the Father hadn't wanted that, until the time was right.
But now, there was another problem to contend with; and Tess sighed deeply as she pulled away from the hug to look at her young charge seriously. "Baby, I know how you must be feeling. But you have got to stay strong on this assignment..." She hesitated. "Things have taken an even worse turn, Angel Girl."
Monica looked up at her supervisor curiously. "What do you mean, Tess?"
Tess frowned. "There is someone else involved in this assignment- someone I certainly didn't expect, although considering the situation, I should have known something like this might happen." Seeing the confused look on her young charge's face, she sighed again. "Kathleen is here."
The young Irish angel looked around. "Here? In this town?"
"Oh, yeah. In this town- and in this assignment. Baby, Kathleen is trying to get her ugly claws into Andrew- and she has a good chance of succeeding if we can't get through to him."
Monica's face paled and for a long moment she didn't speak. "But Andrew hates Kathleen, Tess! She's a demon!"
"I know that and you know it, baby- but Andrew doesn't. Right now he doesn't even know he's an Angel- and that puts him in the worst kind of position because he's open to all sorts of bad influences. Kathleen knows this, and she's using it to her advantage."
Reading Tess' words, Monica suddenly looked horrified. "Has she seen Andrew already, Tess?"
Her supervisor nodded. "Right after he ran out of the homeless shelter- which, incidentally, she made him do- she can control his mind, to some degree although I don't know how much. I guess she can put thoughts into his head that he might think are his... anyway, she got to him, baby. She told him something, and he believed it because she gave him no other choice...." Tess hesitated, not liking what else she had to tell her young charge.
Monica, however, was determined to know. "What aren't you telling me, Tess?"
Tess sighed heavily, and took a moment to answer. "Baby... Kathleen has got Andrew believing that they're married...."
"What?!" Monica looked up at Tess with wide, frightened and angry eyes. "How can she do that, Tess? How can he believe her?"
Tess laid a hand on Monica's arm. "I told you, baby... she's got a hold over him now, one that's gonna be difficult to break. And that means this assignment just went from tricky to downright difficult. Not only do we have to get through to Andrew, we have to win back his soul, because there's gonna be a fight going on for it, between you and Kathleen." She paused a moment, searching Monica's eyes, hoping the seriousness of her words would be enough to make the young angel understand.
"This is something you must fight alone, baby- I can't help you. The Father wants you to bring Andrew back to us- and to do that, you're going to have to beat Kathleen. It's not going to be easy- Kathleen is more powerful than you, and she knows it. But you have the Father on your side, and you have a strong love for Andrew. And, somewhere deep inside of our Angel Boy, he loves you too. If you can find that in him, then Andrew will come back to us."
Monica nodded slowly, feeling more tears prick at her eyes. "What if I fail, Tess?"
The older angel took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. "Then we've lost Andrew forever."
===================
Chapter Four
Kathleen led Andrew to her car, parked nearby, and he got into the passenger seat somewhat reluctantly, still unsure of this woman but unable to refute the physical evidence he'd seen. And as she got into the driver's seat and started the engine, he turned to her, suddenly realizing what effect his memory loss must be having on her. Regardless of whether he could remember or not, she was his wife, it seemed- and this situation must be hurting her terribly.
"You know, Kathleen- I'm really sorry I don't remember you."
Kathleen gave him a small smile. "That's okay, honey- I completely understand. You've been through a lot, and I know it will take some time before things are... right... between us again. But I promise you I'll stick with you through this, Adrian- I'm never going to leave you." She turned her gaze back to the road as she began driving, and spoke in a much quieter voice. "And once everything is good between us, you'll never want to leave me."
***
The drive to Kathleen's house, which was on the outskirts of the city, took about thirty minutes, during which time both occupants of the car remained silent. Kathleen was busy plotting the finer details of her scheme, of which she was especially proud, while Andrew just stared out of the window, trying to remember something, anything, of his wife or his life before he'd been homeless.
No memories were forthcoming, but something else kept popping into his mind instead; the image of the young woman who'd served him soup at the homeless shelter. He didn't know why he kept thinking of her, and was still confused over the fact that she'd appeared to recognize him. And somewhere in his mind he realized that she must be the woman he had been searching for, although he didn't know why.
As the car pulled into the driveway, Andrew turned to Kathleen. "That woman, at the homeless shelter..."
Kathleen rolled her eyes in annoyance as she switched off the engine. "Oh, not her again! Can't you just forget about her and concentrate on us?"
Andrew frowned, unsure of his wife's sudden change of mood. "No, I-I'm sorry, but... I can't forget about her. There's something about her, something that... I don't know, it's almost as if I've been looking for her, but..." He shrugged, frustrated at the fact that the more he thought about the mystery woman, the less he understood about why she seemed so important.
Kathleen narrowed her eyes as she turned to him. "You really want to know why she seems so important, Adrian? Well, I was going to wait until you were feeling a little better, but obviously you're not going to rest until you find out."
She sighed heavily, and a little too dramatically. "Her name is Monica... and yes, you do know her- we both do. And she's the reason why you've been living on the streets for the past couple of weeks."
***
After Kathleen had dropped her little bombshell about Monica, she had coolly got out of the car and wandered toward the house, leaving Andrew stunned, and desperate to find out more information. He quickly got out of the car and followed her as she stepped inside the house. "What did she do?"
Kathleen turned to him as he followed, smirking at how desperate he was to find out about Monica. Well, she decided, she'd give him all the information he needed. "You'll see. Why don't you take a seat, huh? You must be exhausted, honey." She led him into the living room, indicating the couch where he sat down, and she took a seat next to him.
Andrew looked extremely impatient. "In the shelter, she... she seemed so nice! How can she have done anything to me?"
Kathleen tried hard to suppress a smile, instead forcing a false, but nevertheless convincing, look of hurt and anger on her face. "Monica came into our lives about six weeks ago- she kept coming round here wanting to see you, and bothering you at work- she insisted that she knew you! She was like a woman obsessed! I was so worried, Adrian, she wouldn't leave you alone and I was afraid she was going to take you from me! And-and then..." She wiped her eyes, pretending to wipe away tears. "That's exactly what happened..." She sniffed and sobbed.
Andrew looked at this woman compassionately, wishing he could remember something about her. He looked wondered how to comfort her but at the same time feeling uncomfortable about doing so. "In... in the shelter, she called me Andrew...?"
Kathleen nodded and smiled. "Yes! She was convinced that you were somebody she used to know, a long time ago, somebody called Andrew." She wiped away her tears, making sure she looked deep into Andrew's eyes, making him believe what she was saying. "Three weeks ago, you left here to go to work, but you never came home that night. I found out later that... Monica had visited you that day. Now, I don't know what she said to you, but all I could figure was that she'd taken you away... away from me, Adrian!" More tears, sniffles and sobs. "I searched for you everywhere, Adrian- because no matter what she was doing or making you believe, I still loved you! And now after all this time, I've found you again!" She reached out a hand to place on Andrew's knee. "I don't know what happened to make you lose your memory- but I believe Monica is responsible."
Andrew frowned, feeling unsure with this explanation, which seemed very far-fetched. But suddenly a voice inside his head told him it did make sense, and fully explained everything about what had happened to him. Except, he didn't know that the voice inside his head came from the woman sitting beside him. "So... Monica... made me lose my memory? And I've been wandering the streets ever since?"
Kathleen nodded, managing a smile. "Yes! That's right, honey! It's the only explanation that makes sense."
But Andrew still was unsure. "So... then... why have I had a feeling that I should find her?"
His 'wife' narrowed her eyes, her joy at his acceptance of her explanation, fading slightly. "What... do you mean?"
Andrew shrugged. "Ever since... well, as long as I can remember, which is only a couple of weeks I think- I've had a feeling that I needed to find a young woman with long dark hair- I couldn't remember her name, or why I wanted to find her, but... well, you know, when I saw... Monica... today, I wondered if she was that woman I'd been searching for."
Kathleen frowned, trying not to show her annoyance at how close these two angels were- close enough to make her feel sick, in fact. "Well, I..." She thought for a moment, and then smiled. "It makes perfect sense, darling!"
"It does?" Andrew looked confused.
"Yes! You wanted to find her, to get your revenge on her for what you'd done- for almost breaking up your marriage, and for taking you away from me and leaving you homeless and with no memory of who you are!" She paused, watching him carefully. "You've been feeling angry while you've been on the streets, haven't you?"
Andrew nodded. "Yeah... how did... how did you know that?"
Kathleen shrugged. "Well, that's obvious. You're angry at Monica- but you know what? You don't have to be angry any longer. Because now you know the truth, and now we're back together, you can seek revenge on that cow for what she did to you- what she did to both of us."
Andrew's eyes narrowed; something didn't feel right. But as Kathleen reached across and grasped his hand, looking deep into his eyes, all those doubts faded. "I can help you, Adrian- I can help you give Monica what she deserves. Just remember- she's the bad person in all of this. Between the two of us, we can beat her- and then we can be together forever."
===================
Chapter Five
Monica stood alone on the rain-soaked streets, looking at the large, sprawling house set high on a slope beside the road. The Father had told her to come here; this was where Kathleen was acting out her pretence of being Andrew's wife, and so this, at least for the time being, was their 'marital home'.
This thought filled Monica with many different emotions- anger, fear, pain... she couldn't bear the thought of Andrew being close to Kathleen and so far away from her. She and Andrew shared a bond that was stronger than any human love, and even rare in Angelic friendships. It was something strong, something indefinable but which had been with them for a long time now, and always would be... or at least, that's what she'd thought.
Suddenly she hadn't just lost her best friend, she had lost the closeness she shared with him. The link between them that allowed them to communicate with just thoughts and feelings, was absent- it had been removed when Andrew had been sent to God's country, but now was gone, possibly permanently, as he was stuck in human form and unaware of who he was, let alone anyone else.
And at the mercy of a demon.
The young angel lifted troubled eyes to the heavens, not caring about the raindrops that splashed on her face, mixing with her tears. "Father, it's Monica... I-I really don't understand why this has happened to Andrew- I know what he did on my last assignment was wrong, but... surely he has been punished enough? I know You could take him back Home right now if You wanted to- so I don't know why he has to suffer like this."
She listened for a long moment as the Father's reply floated gently down to her heart, and finally she nodded slowly, sadly. "I know. And I don't mean to question You, I'm just trying to understand." She lowered her gaze to the pavement, staring at the raindrops falling into a small puddle at her feet.
After a while she lifted her gaze back to the house where she knew Kathleen and Andrew were inside, although she had no idea what was going on between them, or what lies Kathleen was telling the blond angel. She wasn't allowed to go in there and see for herself, no matter how much she wanted to.
Hearing more words from the Father, she nodded again, lifting her gaze heavenward once again. "I'm going to try my best, Father... but, please, watch over Andrew... and help me to help him see the truth before it's too late."
***
From a distance, Tess stood invisibly at the side of the road as she watched her young charge. She could see the pain in the young angel's eyes, and knew that this was the most difficult assignment Monica had ever had to face. But she also understood why the young Irish angel had to be the one to help Andrew now- for she was closer to him than any other angel, and if anyone was going to get through to him and help him remember the truth, it was Monica.
But that didn't mean she wasn't worried. As she watched the young Irish angel talking silently to the Father, she felt herself needing some reassurance also. "Father... I know Your reasons for putting Monica on this assignment, and I'm certainly not going to question them. But... I also know how strong Kathleen is, and how much more powerful she is than my Angel Girl. So, please... won't You let me help out more on this assignment?"
Tess listened carefully, and the answer didn't take long to make it's way into her heart. Sighing, she frowned. "Well, if it has to be that way, I won't argue." She continued to watch as her young charge, apparently unable to look at the house any longer, began to walk further down the road, hands in her pockets and head bowed.
The oldest angel shook her head sadly. "Dear Father, please give her the strength she's gonna need for this. I know she makes mistakes sometimes, and she doesn't have a whole lot of experience- but she has to succeed at this... I need both my Angel Babies back safely by the end of this assignment, and I don't know what I'll do if that doesn't happen."
***
Andrew felt much better after a shower and shave, and a change of clothes, having found plenty in the closet in the master bedroom- clothes that Kathleen had assured him were his. After changing into a comfortable sweater and jeans, he'd taken a look around the house, trying to find something that was familiar, but nothing seemed recognizable, not even the photographs placed around the house of him and Kathleen together, pictures that he couldn't remember being taken, in places he didn't recognize.
It was a very lonely feeling, in some ways more lonely than being out on the streets. Out there he'd found an identity, knew landmarks around the city, had learnt about the places he could go to find free leftovers to eat, the places to avoid, even made some friends within the vast homeless community. But all that had changed since Kathleen had taken him back here, and he wondered how long it would take him to settle in and feel at home here.
And then, of course, there was Monica. Kathleen had made him realize that this young woman was the reason why he barely remembered his own name, let alone his wife and home, and as he'd sat with Kathleen earlier, he'd found himself getting angry again, an emotion he was certainly familiar with, as he'd listened to how Monica had ruined his life.
But now, alone in the upstairs of the house while Kathleen prepared a meal for him, Andrew had found the anger dissipating and instead his thoughts of Monica were ones of curiosity, not anger.
"What is happening to me?" Andrew stopped to look out of the window, watching the rain falling down in sheets outside, and in the distance he saw a lone figure walking down the road, too far away to see clearly who it was but he realized it reminded him of someone... Monica, perhaps? Shaking his head, he tried to clear these confusing thoughts out of his head. Surely, in the absence of his memories, he should be trusting what his wife told him? After all, he thought, she would have no reason to lie.
Taking a deep breath, Andrew walked downstairs, hoping that a good meal might help him think more clearly. He certainly was looking forward to eating something other than stale bread, leftovers, or soup from the shelter.
And as his mind drifted to the shelter, those thoughts inevitably turned to Monica again. And he soon realized that he had to see her again, if only to determine once and for all just why this young woman seemed so important to him. He wanted to trust what his wife was saying, but something inside of him needed to find out the truth for himself.
***
The meal Kathleen had prepared for Andrew was eaten mostly in silence, and the blond angel felt terribly uncomfortable in a house that his 'wife' assured him he should be comfortable in- after all, they'd lived in it for five years, ever since they were married- or so she told him. But he couldn't remember any of it, and he wondered why, after just a couple of weeks, his memory should be so severely affected.
Finishing his plate of food which he'd eaten rather hungrily, Andrew looked up to see Kathleen watching him with an unreadable expression on her face, and he frowned. "Kathleen? What is it?"
"Oh! Er... nothing... I was just..." She forced a smile onto her face. "I was just thinking it's so nice to have you back here again, Adrian... I've missed you so much." She reached across the table, grasping his hand in hers, and Andrew just wished her touch felt familiar to him. To be honest, it didn't even feel remotely comfortable, although he didn't want to tell her that.
Sighing, Andrew looked at this woman, a complete stranger to him. "I think I'll go out for a while, I... need to get some air."
Kathleen's smile faded at once. "Well, where are you going?"
Andrew shrugged, deciding it was best not to tell her of his plans to visit the shelter. "Just... out... I don't know where, really."
"Do you want me to come with you?"
But the blond angel shook his head as he got up from the table. "No, I... I just need to be by myself for a while... this is all kinda confusing for me, and... I have a lot of thinking to do." He managed a small smile at her. "Please, it's nothing you need to worry about."
Kathleen finally nodded, although somewhat reluctantly. "Okay, then... but don't be gone too long, will you? I haven't seen you in such a long time, I couldn't bear to be apart from you again." She also got to her feet, moving to Andrew's side and looking up at him, hoping for a kiss, but evidently Andrew wasn't aware of this as he just nodded and left the room, leaving Kathleen angry.
She heard the front door close and scowled. "Don't think I don't know what you're up to, you pathetic angel. I know you're off to find Monica... but she'll never get you back- I'll make sure of it."
===================
Chapter Six
Andrew felt his heart beating faster in his chest as he approached the homeless shelter. He was feeling a mixture of emotions; just this morning he was in that building, homeless and desperate for some soup to fill his empty stomach. And now here he was, dressed smartly, suddenly with a wife and a home, and from what he could tell about the way Kathleen was dressed and the furnishings in his home, fairly well off as well. He paused in his tracks as he watched a homeless man walk into the shelter; it seemed unreal to him that he'd been one of those people. It was like some strange dream, made worse by the fact that he still had no memories of his life before the past couple of weeks.
And then there was Monica. Somehow, deep inside of him, he wanted to know for sure just who this young woman was, and why she seemed so important to him. Was she as bad as Kathleen had made her out to be? "Well, there's only one way to be sure," he told himself, taking a deep breath before crossing the street and walking into the shelter. Inside he looked around, but realized that he couldn't see Monica anywhere- and this disappointed him.
"Can I help you?" Andrew turned to see one of the volunteers looking at him. "Uh... yeah, I-I... I was looking for a young woman who works here... her name is Monica."
The volunteer nodded. "She works mornings only... she won't be back until tomorrow, I'm afraid."
Andrew looked at him hopefully. "Well... do you... do you know where she lives?"
But the volunteer shook his head. "Sorry, buddy, I don't have that information. But if you come here tomorrow morning, she should be here."
Andrew nodded. "Yeah... thanks." Somewhat disappointed, he walked out of the shelter, suddenly wondering why he felt so sad at not finding her. He walked solemnly down the street, not really sure where he was going, and not really wanting to go back home, he realized. For reasons he couldn't explain, he felt a stronger need to find Monica than he did to go home to his wife. Perhaps it was just because he was used to being on the streets, he figured. But whatever the reason, he carried on walking, hoping somehow to find her, although deep down he knew the search was hopeless.
***
Monica sat alone in the park, sitting on a swing and uncharacteristically not interested in watching the children playing nearby, or the ducks swimming on the pond. She was too upset to think of anything but Andrew; too afraid to go to him now that she knew Kathleen was with him, somehow feeling inadequate in a way she couldn't understand. Her teary eyes stared down at her feet and she was so lost in thought that she wasn’t aware of anything else around her.
After a long while the young angel lifted her soft brown eyes to the sky and whispered painfully, "How can I reach him, Father? How can I save him from Kathleen? I don't know if I'm strong enough." She listened, hoping for Him to tell her that yes, she was strong enough, and that He would be there with her the whole time. But no such answer came; in fact Monica didn't hear anything from her Father. Deep down she should have known that He would be there for her, that she didn't need Him to tell her that; but His silence just made her feel even more lost and alone.
***
Standing some distance away, but close enough to see the pain on her young charge's face, Tess stood invisibly, watching Monica as she whispered her prayer. Knowing of the silence that had followed, Tess also glanced heavenward. "I know You want her to be strong, Father, and I know that she needs to find her own way through this- but is this the right way?" She frowned, hearing His answer. "Yes, I know I shouldn't question You, and I do trust You- but my baby girl is hurting, and I don't know how to get through to her. She needs to be working hard on this assignment, but instead she's too afraid to do anything! And I don't know how to help her."
Once more Tess listened to the Father's reply, and then nodded solemnly. "I'll do my best."
***
It had been almost an hour since Andrew had left the homeless helter, and since then he'd been wandering the streets, still feeling like he belonged there, still wanting nothing more than to find the young woman who somehow seemed to be the key to everything that had happened to him. Alone with his thoughts, he'd been trying to come to terms with all that had happened to him in the space of just a few short hours. The fact that he had a wife still didn't sit right with him, but he tried to tell himself that it was just because of his amnesia. Kathleen seemed a nice enough woman, yet he had no desire to be with her, and he felt a little guilty about that; after all it wasn't her fault he had no memories. And he was having a hard time getting used to the fact that tonight, and from now on, he wouldn't be sleeping out on the streets.
Looking around him, he saw a park up ahead, the tall iron gates at the entrance seeming to invite him in. With no other ideas of where to go, he walked toward the entrance, but as he stepped through the open gateway, a familiar voice startled him. "Adrian! There you are!"
Andrew turned and sighed inwardly when he saw his wife. "Kathleen... what are you doing here?"
Kathleen smiled up at him as she linked her arm into his. "I was looking for you, honey... I was worried about you. I've lost you once already, haven't I? I don't want to lose you again." She narrowed her eyes. "You shouldn't have worried me like that."
Andrew shrugged. "I-I'm sorry, I... got to walking around, and I guess I didn't realize the time..." His gaze shifted away from Kathleen and he glanced around the park, wondering, hoping... but then he felt a tug on his arm and he looked down to see his wife smiling up at him. "Come on, honey... let's go home, huh?" Unsure what else to do, Andrew nodded. "Okay..." As he spoke, Kathleen gazed at him, her eyes seemingly looking right into him, making him feel light headed. Then before he knew it, her lips were pressed against his in a long kiss. Finally Kathleen pulled back and smiled at him, looking satisfied. "Oh, how I've missed you, Adrian." And then she led him out of the park, but as she did so, she glanced behind her, unseen by Andrew, and a smile crossed her face.
***
Monica had got up from her seat on the swing and was walking slowly across the grass when a sight up ahead stopped her in her tracks. Andrew was there, and for a moment she wanted to run to him, to stay with him until he remembered everything. But as she got closer, with a shock that felt like a jolt to her heart, she realized that he wasn't alone... Kathleen was with him. And, feeling like she was in a bad dream, the young angel could only stand there helplessly as she saw the two of them kiss, feeling suddenly empty inside. Tears ran down her cheeks as she stood there, making herself invisible, not wanting Andrew to see her now, whether or not he remembered her.
And as Monica stood there crying, Kathleen led Andrew away, turning to give her a triumphant smile.
===================
Chapter Seven
Tess shook her head sadly as she walked toward her young charge, who was standing in the park with a terribly lost expression on her face. Taking a deep breath, she made her way over, and Monica looked up at her but didn't speak. "Baby... come here."
Monica practically threw herself into Tess' open arms as tears she thought had dried up once more began streaming down her face. "Oh, Tess! It's all going so wrong and I don't know how to fix it!"
Tess pulled back to look into Monica's eyes. "Angel Girl, you do know how- you love Andrew dearly, and that's all you need to get you through this assignment."
But the young angel shook her head, wiping away the tears. "I don't know if it is enough, Tess. He seems to like Kathleen now... the two of them..." Her words trailed off as she shook her head, remembering once again, painfully, what she had witnessed.
The oldest angel sighed heavily. "Andrew needs you, Miss Wings! Why do you think he was here? Deep down inside, he wants to find you. Can't you see that?"
Monica frowned. "What I saw, was my best friend kissing Kathleen."
Tess placed her hands on her hips and glared at her young charge angrily. "Kathleen kissed our Angel Boy. And don't you think for one moment that it was any other way. Andrew didn't want that- but she's got some kind of a spell on him, and it's up to you to break it, Miss Wings."
"I don't know if I can. She's won, Tess. I can't beat her." The younger angel sounded defeated, but Tess was having none of it.
"Oh, is that so? You're just gonna give up on Andrew, is that it? Do you think he'd give up on you if it was you in trouble?"
"No... but I don't know how to reach him, Tess!"
"Through your heart, baby- like you've always done. Go to him, tell him who you are and make his soul listen to you. Deep down it already wants to."
***
"Adrian, please don't go running off like that again- you scared me to death!" Kathleen walked into the living room carrying two mugs of coffee, one of which she handed to Andrew. "What were you thinking, honey?"
Andrew shrugged as he stared down at the mug of coffee. Somewhere at the back of his mind he thought it should be important, but...
"Adrian?"
He looked up, startled out of his thoughts, and as his gaze met Kathleen's, whatever memory he was trying to recall suddenly vanished. "I.. er... sorry, what did you say?"
Kathleen scowled with annoyance. "Adrian, what has got into you? You're acting so strangely since you came back to me..."
Andrew shrugged, unsure how to answer. "I-I'm sorry, I... I guess it's just hard, you know, not being able to remember anything."
Then Kathleen's scowl faded as she plastered a smile on her face, reaching across to place her hand on Andrew's knee. "Oh, honey, I'm so sorry... I should have realized. This must be so hard for you, and I'm sorry I don't understand how you're feeling. I'm trying my best, you know."
Andrew nodded. "Yeah. I know you are. I just... I guess I need time, you know?"
Kathleen nodded and smiled, glancing out into the hall as something came into her mind. "Adrian... I completely understand. And I'm sorry for being so hard on you." She smiled at her 'husband' as she stood up. "I... er... I have some things I need to do. Why don't you stay here, huh? Maybe it will bring back some memories."
Sighing, Andrew smiled back at her, trying his best not to upset this woman. "Yeah... okay. I'll... see you later, huh?"
"You sure will." Kathleen walked out into the hall and glanced at the front door, narrowing her eyes for a moment, glaring at something only she was aware of. And then, out of sight of Andrew, she disappeared from sight.
===================
Chapter Eight
Monica stood on the street looking up at the large house in front of her. "I have to do this…" she whispered, remembering the encouragement Tess had given her. "I can do this." Then the young angel took a deep breath, and walked up the driveway toward the house. When she reached the door she hesitated a moment, closing her eyes briefly to send up a silent prayer for her dear friend, and then she rang the doorbell. For a moment she wanted to run, but as she heard footsteps approaching, and the door handle being turned, she knew it was too late to turn back now. She looked up as the door opened, and smiled when she saw Andrew standing there.
"Andrew... hello."
Andrew was surprised to see Monica here, at the house- and despite his urgency to see her earlier, now Kathleen's words kept running through his mind and he stared at the young woman warily. "What are you doing here?"
Monica tried to stay calm, but stuttered nervously. "I-I... I needed to see you, Andrew! You have to get away from here before it's too late!"
"Too late? Too late for what? And why do you keep calling me Andrew? My name is Adrian." Suddenly feeling angry, Andrew started to close the door but Monica stepped forward, determined now not to let her friend go without a fight. "Your name is Andrew... and everything Kathleen has told you is a lie." She looked deep into Andrew's eyes, seeing nothing of the love or kindness there, that she used to see. "Please believe me! I am Monica, your best friend, and I am..." She stopped abruptly when Andrew laughed briefly.
"You're just like Kathleen said... obsessed! You know, I even wanted to find you today, to know for sure who you were- but now I've seen all I want to see and everything Kathleen says makes sense. Just... just tell me one thing, Monica... did you do this to me? Is it your fault I've lost my memory?"
Shocked, Monica felt tears pricking at her eyes. Is this what Andrew thought? That she'd caused this? She thought back to the assignment that had started all of these problems...
...FLASHBACK...
Andrew appeared just as Stan’s fist connected with the young angel’s jaw, and the sight of the tall, heavily-built man hitting the much-smaller angel was too much and Andrew ran forward, making himself visible. “Get away from her!” He pushed Stan away from Monica and the man turned, surprised, and glared at the blond angel. “Stay out of this!” As the man launched himself toward Monica again, Andrew quickly raised his hand, punching Stan square in the face as Monica looked on, horrified. The force of the blow due to Andrew’s angelic strength was enough to knock Stan to the ground where he fell, unconscious.
Andrew turned to Monica, lifting a gentle hand to her bruised jaw, but she flinched, taking a step back and trying to process what had just happened. Andrew frowned, confused. “Monica...?”
“Andrew, you’re coming with me.”
The blond angel turned to see Sam standing a few feet away, his face solemn. “Sam, what’s going on?”
“I think you know what’s going on, Andrew... Tess warned you that you were treading a dangerous path. Now you’ve crossed the line, and you have to face the consequences.”
...END FLASHBACK...
Remembering the events that had led up to Andrew's situation, Monica realized that in a way, she was to blame for it all- she hadn't handled that assignment well enough. But as she tried to explain, she innocently didn't realize that her words were just enforcing what Kathleen had told Andrew. "I-I... I'm sorry, Andrew... I know I wasn't handling things the right way, but..." She looked up at him with pleading eyes. "Please, forgive me for what happened! I never knew it would turn out this way... I never wanted to see you like this."
Deep inside of him, Andrew felt a stab of pain at seeing Monica so upset. But then Kathleen's words came to him again, and he realized that now, he knew for sure that this young woman was to blame for his situation- she'd just confirmed it. "I can't forgive you- not when you've ruined my life!" As he got angrier, his voice got louder. "Get out. I never want to see you again, you got that? To think, I-I even wanted to find you! But now..." He shook his head.
"Andrew... you must listen to me! I'm telling you the truth... please!" Monica could barely see through her tears, and for the first time in her existence, she realized she was frightened of the man who had once been her dearest friend.
"Just go, Monica! I mean it- I don't ever want to see you anywhere near me, or my wife." He stepped forward and Monica flinched backwards, out of his way as he slammed the door. Distraught, Monica ran down the driveway and onto the street, not noticing Kathleen standing near the side of the house, a smile of satisfaction crossing her face.
===================
Chapter Nine
Alone on a quiet street a few blocks away from Andrew and Kathleen's house, Monica sat on a wall, invisible to all humans, a sorrowful and afraid expression on her face as she looked up toward the sky and prayed softly. "Father... I know You don't want me to give up on Andrew, and that's not what I want to do. But please, tell me how I can get through to him, when he wants nothing to do with me now! It hurts so much..." She glanced downwards, staring at her hands clasped in her lap, and sighed. "It hurts..."
The gentle voice of the Father floated down to the young angel's heart, telling her that He knew she was hurting, but that He was always there for her. She managed a soft smile, lifting her gaze to the heavens once more, watching the clouds floating silently past, remembering times when she and Andrew had spent some time together just watching the clouds... oh, she missed his voice, the way he looked at her... and perhaps most of all, the silent communication that their hearts and souls shared.
Without this, Monica felt empty inside. No longer able to feel Andrew close to her, even when physically they were miles apart. No longer able to sense his feelings when they were together. It was as if a part of her was missing; a big part that although hadn't been with her for very long, for this gift had only been with them for a few months, still had such an impact on her now that it was absent.
"I miss you, Andrew... even though I saw you, back there... it wasn't you..." She reached up to brush the tears from her eyes, sniffing slightly. "I don't understand how I can see you, talk to you, but yet... all that I knew about you is gone." Her mind suddenly filled with thoughts about their special gift of communication, Monica recalled how it had all began- in dreams, when she was being held captive by demons during a previous assignment...
...FLASHBACK...
Monica walked slowly along the beach, gazing at the deep blue sea. As far as she could see the golden sand stretched out ahead of her and to her left, while the water stretched out an equal distance to her right, and beyond that, nothing else was visible. Gentle waves splashed against rocks at the edge of the beach and the sky was as blue as the water; only a few fluffy white clouds drifted overhead. It was a lovely summer day, the breeze soft and warm. Somewhere around her Monica could hear birds singing and the sweet smell of Jasmine perfumed the air.
The young angel walked barefoot through the sand, her long white dress flowing just past her ankles. She felt happy and free, but yet at the same time troubled as she searched for something, someone...
Up ahead in the distance she saw Andrew walking toward her, his white shirt and pale gray trousers complementing the shoulder-length blond hair that blew away from his face as he walked. His face was solemn but as he saw her, their eyes met and his face lit up with a smile, as did hers. Moments later they were standing in front of each other, as Monica reached out to take Andrew’s hand, gazing up at him.
“Andrew.. my friend. I have missed you so much.”
Andrew nodded, smiling down at her lovingly. “And I’ve missed you, Monica.”
...END FLASHBACK...
That first time, neither angel really knew or understood that what they were experiencing wasn't a dream. But after that, it had become clear...
...FLASHBACK...
Andrew smiled to himself as he realized he was walking along the beach again. It was a strange feeling, because now he knew he was dreaming, and almost felt able to control what would happen. As he walked he wished that he would see Monica, and suddenly there she was, sitting on the sand a few meters in front of him. She didn’t seem to notice him but as he approached and sat down beside her, she turned to him and smiled, but her eyes seemed haunted, lost.
“Monica...” Andrew breathed her name thankfully, glad of the time to spend with her even if it was only in dreams. “It’s good to see you.”
The younger angel nodded tearfully, her face never losing that haunted look that Andrew so desperately wanted to take away from her. “But... you shouldn’t be here, Andrew...”
Andrew nodded silently. “This is my dream, Monica... and I wanted to see you here.” He watched as she looked at him curiously, and suddenly everything became clear to him, in a way that he hadn’t thought possible. “Angel Girl... this is a dream, but... what’s happening is real.”
...END FLASHBACK...
As the memories ended, Monica smiled sadly. "No matter how far apart we were during that assignment, we could still communicate... in our dreams..." She frowned, thinking for a moment, and then got to her feet as a thought struck her. "In our dreams..."
***
Once more, unknown to Monica, her supervisor was watching from a distance, keeping an eye on her young charge, worried for her as well as for her Angel Boy. Tess knew she wasn't really supposed to help Monica on this assignment- the young angel had to get Andrew back by herself; but Tess also knew how difficult that was proving to be.
So now, as Tess stood and watched, aware of what Monica had been thinking and the revelation that the young angel had just had, she smiled. "Thank You, Father."
===================